My friend, Tori, recently turned me on to this thing called Project Rant (just search it on YouTube) and I noticed at work after working three days in a row this week (not something I’ve ever done at Office Depot) that I have dozens of rants throughout the day just about that place and stuff that happens there. So here they are, mostly for my benefit. Just to give that disclaimer – I know this is whiny and none of this really matters but just need to vent about it.
1. I am not a mapquest.
People constantly call the store (and as the cashier, I answer the phone during my shifts) or come in and ask directions to either (a) our store, (b) another Office Depot and/or (c) other places they want to go to around the location of my store. Where I live, on NCSU’s campus, is not in the same part of Raleigh as where I work. I pretty much only go that way if I’m going to work because everyone who goes to State, knows it is usually closer or at least easier to go to Cary. In fact, if I didn’t work at the Office Depot in Raleigh, I would go to the one in Cary if I needed to go to such a place. Furthermore, why the FUCK would I know how to get to an Office Depot that I don’t work at? True, most of the managers and some of the employees who have been there awhile have gone to the other stores, but I’ve never had to and why would I just for fun? Why do you expect me to know where an Office Depot that I don’t work at is located? That doesn’t make any SENSE. I can tell you the address because it’s right there in front of me on a little card but I can’t tell you what shopping center it is. And, finally, I cannot tell you how to get to my store from wherever you are unless you happen to be at N.C. State. That’s what mapquest and GPS are for. I can tell you about the shopping center we’re in and what’s across the street but not what exit to take. WHY ARE YOU ASKING ME?
2. Why would you go to a store to buy ink for your printer if you don’t know what kind of ink you need and just expect someone to help you figure it out?
There are tons of printers, at least four major brands, and tons of ink choices for each of the kinds of printers for each of the brands. I cannot magically tell you which ink cartridge is for you if all you tell me is that it’s an HP that prints, copies, and scans. MOST HP prints these days do all three of those things. That tells me NOTHING. But most people come in and have their printer number. That is possible to find – but it involves me taking SIX extra steps, as if I don’t have enough shit to do. As the cashier, I have to ring out all of the customers who need to buy stuff, answer the phone, and complete a task list, which usually includes stocking ink, separating ad signs, putting up candy and drinks, etc. And, trust me, answering the phone and ringing out customers is enough as it is. Yet you expect me to take my precious time to hunt down your ink when ALL you had to do was open the little flap where they go and read the big block numbers on the end. That’s it. Especially for HP – there are big, bold, dark numbers printed, facing out – those are the only numbers you need to come find your ink. Furthermore, all of the ink is in FREAKIN numerical order. I have so many people coming in looking for ink and they actually know the number they need but can’t find it – do you not know how COUNTING works?! If you need to buy ink, have the information you need instead of expecting strangers at the store to help you. Because most stores aren’t as nice about it as the Office Depot employees are forced to be and make you look it up your damn self. Oh – one last note – YOU CAN WALK BEHIND MY COUNTER. I know because there is a counter in front of the ink where we usually have the main register, you think you can’t walk in and pick out your ink. You think you have to wait in line and make me be your servant to get it for you. NO. They all have security devices and, as previously mentioned, I am busy. There is no sign that says you can’t walk into Ink Depot. So freakin do it. And leave me alone.
3. Read your freakin coupons.
99% of the coupons that Office Depot provides its customers with are not applicable to technology, even though that is what a lot of people come in to buy. I know that it is a poor system and sucks for you. I know. But it’s just the way life is. So don’t come to me with a printer and a coupon and get pissed off at me when it doesn’t work because YOU didn’t read the fine print. Don’t argue with me about how you didn’t know that and it isn’t fair because half the store is technology and that’s what we push. That’s NOT MY PROBLEM. The coupon SAYS “Not valid on any technology or consumer electronic products” usually under number three. And that’s what I, as an Office Depot employee, must follow. It is not my fault that Office Depot has shit coupons like that and it is not my fault that you didn’t read the coupon. And DON’T argue with me about what is and isn’t technology. We have seven aisles entitled “Technology A,” “Technology B,” and so on. ANYTHING on those aisles (including label makers, shredders, surge protectors, CD-R’s, and even laptop cases) are considered technology and will not be counted for your coupon. GET OVER IT. Buy some damn paper when you need it and then use the coupon. As a side note, they also have expiration dates (which most coupons for most stores have) and it is also not my fault if you didn’t notice that date. It’s not. It’s yours.
4. Read the return policy on the back of the receipt before coming to the store
Almost every store (maybe everyone but that “almost” is my disclaimer) has their return policy on the back of their receipt paper, including Office Depot. Now, I will admit to you that our return policy is strict and probably unfair. No argument from me on that. BUT the fact that you can’t adhere to it is absolutely not my fault (and neither is the policy itself). At Office Depot, you have 14 days to return technology products and furniture with a receipt. Primarily for most technology items, you only have the option to exchange them if they have been opened (such as printers and notebook computers) and for software you can only exchange it for the same item if it has been opened. For everything else (i.e. office supplies), you can return it within 30 days of purchase and we don’t really care if it’s been opened or not. Anything beyond that return policy is not usually accepted although I am consistently undermined by some of the managers, primarily the store manager who does what he wants. So if you just come to me with your return that I can’t do anything about under the policy, you will leave unsatisfied. Although it does piss me off, I suggest asking for a manager if you would like something more to be done for you.
The biggest thing I get is people trying to return stuff without a receipt. WHAT ARE YOU THINKING? I would say 99% of places now will not accept returns or exchanges without a receipt. Unless it is an Office Depot brand item, there is no way to know that you got it at an Office Depot (so you could have paid less for it than what we would refund you). If it is an Office Depot brand item, there’s no way to know (a) which store you got it from (because inventory does vary from store to store, regardless of what you think, so it could be an item that our particular store no longer carries) or (b) when you bought it (i.e. if it would be returnable under the policy). And we still may not know what you paid for it because what if it was on sale that week but it isn’t now (thus giving you more money than you deserve) or what if you used a coupon (also giving you more money than you deserve)? OR – this could also hurt you – what if the item is on sale NOW? Then you will get back less money than you actually paid for it. While the return policy itself is pretty strict, the fact that you have to have a receipt makes TOTAL sense and I don’t understand why the FUCK you people don’t understand that?!
And I also don’t understand why YOU get pissed at ME when you try to return something outside the limits of the policy, as if it is my fault that YOU screwed up. I don’t care if you just now opened that thing you bought 3 months ago only to find out it isn’t what you need. That is YOUR problem. If you weren’t sure whether or not it was what you needed, you either should have waited to buy it or looked at (or asked about) the return policy when you bought it to keep a check on whether or not you needed to return it. This is not my fault. I even try to make your life easier by letting you know when you buy technology or furniture that you only have 14 days to return it. That way, I am vocally telling you the policy – not that you shouldn’t take it upon yourself to find out about it and read the back of the receipt because you should, but I am making an effort to help YOU out. And you still fucking bitch at me when it is YOUR issue. YOUR fault. WHAT IS THAT ABOUT?
5. Don’t be rude.
As a “Customer Service Specialist” it is basically my job to be nice to you and help you find what you’re looking for and have a pleasant experience during your trip to Office Depot. That doesn’t mean you can treat me like I’m not a person. Don’t cut me off when I’m only asking you about the rewards card or if you need stamps or would like a protection plan. It’s just a question that will take me a few seconds to ask and a few seconds for you to respond to – are you really in too much of a hurry to be polite and let me do my job? Yes, I KNOW you probably don’t want to sign up for a rewards card if you don’t already have one, I KNOW you probably don’t want the protection plan or stamps. But some people do and, regardless, it is part of my job to ask. So just let me. And when I’m being sunny and cheerful but you’re having a bad day, it’s not nice to bring me down with you. If I spoke to you the way you speak to me, you would be calling a manager, leaving the store, and/or never shopping here again. So why do you think it is okay to speak to me that way when it wouldn’t be for me to do so to you? I’m not a lesser person than you just because I work at Office Depot. I guess I would be if I was like 30 and worked there full-time, maybe, and you were like a lawyer but that isn’t the case. I’m just a kid with part-time job while I finish school and I’m just as good as you or, at least, will be one day, so the fact that I’m the one working where you’re shopping doesn’t make you better than me and mean you can speak to me however you want to. I don’t work for you. I work for Office Depot. I’m only here to help you and it makes me want to help you a lot less when you’re rude.
Those are my main rants. I have some others, I’m sure, but they’re not coming to mind at the moment – these are the five things I deal with the most every day that really grate on my nerves. In fact, I would say probably 95% of my issues at work come from the customers rather than the people I work with. I pretty much enjoy the people I work with and get along with them – there is some pretty good teamwork on most days. It’s the customers who are assholes. And that’s no good because I feel like it is a lot easier to be a customer than an employee so the customers should be nicer. There’s a lot of you and few of us so let’s make everything run better by being both good customers and good employees. Don’t ask for directions, know what ink you need, read your coupons, read your return policy, and just don’t be rude. How hard is that?
